Thursday, April 16, 2009

Keys to the Kingdom

I think I've figured out the cure for all my parenting woes! I am feeling like a bit of a genius here, and while I don't want to gloat too much, I just have to take a minute to pat myself on the back.

I am going to start making my kids speak with a British accent. I don't care what they actually say, as long as it is pronounced in that crisp, proper and decidedly smart sounding manner that our friends across the pond use.

While in Whistler, we encountered quite a few Brits both on the slopes and in the village. Many of them being young children. My husband and I were completely entranced by them. In fact, one poor little boy on the lift with us was at serious risk of being kidnapped and consequential assimilation into the classless Williams household.

Admittedly, these children were extraordinarily polite and engaging, but I am telling you, they could have been swearing at me and I would have been charmed by the lilt of their voices and the sophistication of their cadence. 

I am convinced that by simply changing the sound of what comes out of my boys' mouths will make them much more tolerable. We'll deal with the content later...  After mum isn't feeling quite so cross.

Cheers!

26 comments:

Andrea @ The Train To Crazy said...

This is hilarious! Great idea.

Soxy Deb said...

Cheeri-o!! Bangers and Mash!

That's all I got. Now I'll slip back into my urban ebonics...

Holla back G!

jill jill bo bill said...

OMG that IS brilliant!!! I wonder if you can mumble in cockney...

Sally's World said...

LOL...well, we are british, so theres certainly nothing cute about it to me, but then all kids speak a foreign language to me, slang...don't get it, so any time i understand anyone under the age of 20, i feel good.

Elaine A. said...

BRILLIANT!! : )

jsprik said...

aaahhh if only it were really that easy!! lol ;)

CaJoh said...

Yea, but then you'd have to start spelling certain words differently as well and get bad grades in school.

But I guess the coulor is all wrong on the pram anyway.

Cheeri-o!!

Ann Onymous said...

Rawther, I say!

kel said...

Roslyn and I talk in british accents all the time.. but we do the cockney "dickens-ish" accent. We don't sound that smart.

Tony@ That One Paticular Harbor said...

Curiously Brilliant Mum. The Queen wishes you well on this journey. God's Speed. ( aka -- good luck with that.)

Kristina P. said...

Smashing idea, love! Everything is better with a British accent.

Nobody's Girl said...

GENIUS!

Tabitha in Bliss said...

LMAO!!!
Pip Pip and Cherri-o
Hilarious!!

Ginger said...

That's funny. I can't understand english accents too well. We had a neighbor that was from England and she asked me why I was in the garish. The what???? it was garage.

Em said...

I have cousins that are British - and seriously, they fascinate the hell out of me.

They could tell their Mum to go "bugger off" - and it still sounds cool.

Absolutely smashing, daarrling.

Tiaras and Tantrums said...

hee hee - I agree - so cute they are. My friend's kids speak so politely as well - they are aussies and I could just sit and listen to them all for hours!

dana said...

I can't understand a word those Englishers say! So you'll never have to worry about getting cussed out and knowing about it. Have them speak Scottish with a lilt. No matter what they say it'll sound like you're walking on the moors......

on second thought, who wants to walk on moors anyway....that's where the zombies live.

A Woman Of No Importance said...

Aussies? - Polite? I don't think so...

I wish you could hear some of our (redneck equivalent) chav kids - All nasal whining and speaking in a different language... Not all English speakers sound wonderful, Debs, but good luck with your lovely boys and learning the Queen's English - Say after me, "Hoi noi, broin coi!" x

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

What a great idea!! I wish I had thought of that many years ago! My kids would be perfect now!

Harlene said...

How do you roll your eyes in a British accent?

I've never tried the accent thing but, I have required them to do the "Safety Dance" at stop lights, just because I can.

Beth said...

By George, I think you've got it! Those crackey comments with a lovely Oxfordian lilt make me smile, as well.

You are a genius!

Missy said...

Let me know how this works out! Sounds great!

Denise @ Sunflowers, Chocolate and Little Boys said...

Good luck with that....let me know how it goes. I am having a hard time trying to teach my little ones to not repeat all the stuff they hear on Spongebob....I just dont have the energy to teach them an accent too.

Wendyburd1 said...

All right if you insist, but you must realize that you will have to take their dental hygeine too!!

Cheerio!

Jenners said...

What a great idea, mate! I agree with you .. the British can say almost anything and it sounds classy and wonderful. Who knew it was so simple after all?

Lindsay said...

Cheerio, ole' chap, I do so agree. I am quite fond of the Queen's English myself.