Friday, November 21, 2008

We Interrupt Our Regularly Scheduled Program to Bring You...

So I had not yet even begun to bask in the self-pity and martyrdom brought on by Panic Attack #1, when I was totally blind-sided by Panic Attack #2! And let me tell you, if you think a Turducken sounds traumatic, you haven't met my sister-in-law. You see, Panic Attack #2 involves a surprise Christmas visit from said relative. Sure, on the surface this seems benign. However there is much (MUCH) more to the story. I am beginning to sense a full psychotic break in my future. 

Luckily, my brain is very adept at shutting down and going into "avoidance" mode (that, or someone gave me a lobotomy in my sleep last night). So, for today, we will simply ignore the fact that a) I have ZERO freezer space due to "the horrid beast that shall not be named", and b) for the past 15 years, my sister-in-law has spent Christmas with us, but has YET to actually be invited or give proper notice (telling an 11 y.o. does NOT count). Now, I would have just assumed she was coming to ruin things yet again this year, had MY HUSBAND NOT ASSURED ME she would NOT be coming. 

Interesting that my husband plays prominent roles in both panic attacks #1 and #2. Hmm...

So, let's be happy and festive! I'll list for you some of my favorite Christmas songs, in no particular order. If you actually go looking for any of the songs, it is important that you stick with the version I suggest:

1) Christmas Waltz (Nancy Wilson ONLY. Don't bother with The Carpenters' version. Snooze)
2) Christmas Wrapping (The Waitresses)
3) This Christmas (Donny Hathaway)
4) Do They Know it's Christmas (Band Aid. You could go with Barenaked Ladies' version, too)
5) Last Christmas (Wham. My own guilty pleasure)
6) God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman (Barenaked Ladies WITH Sarah McLachlan)
7) Song for a Winter's Night (Sarah McLachlan)
8) Var. on the Kanon by Pachelbel (George Winston. Oh, this brings back memories)
9) All I Want for Christmas is You (Mariah Carey. Just for fun)

I may never get to my 12 part series...and that might just be a GOOD thing.


Lindsay said...

Yet another reason to be thankful for the family I have. All of my in-laws live 500 miles away, so I have ZERO chance of them just stopping by (we nip that one by going up there for Christmas at some point anyway). All of my family is luckily courteous enough not to drop in at will. My mom won't even do that to see me because she doesn't want to annoy my husband (a concern he had when we decided to live close to my parents).

A couple of my favorite Christmas songs:
"So This is Christmas" - John Lennon
"Wonderful Christmas Time" - Paul McCartney and Wings
"O Holy Night" - I'll take almost any version, but I really like Josh Groban's
"Mary Did You Know"

I probably could go on and on. I like Christmas music...

Kristina P. said...

I LOVE the BNL Christmas album. Good call.

Denise said...

I love your Christmas song list. My fav is "O Holy Night" sung by just about anyone. And I love "Milk and Cookies" by Clint Black.

stefanie said...

It makes me sad that in many aspects holidays=torture. Our families are far away, and unless we go there, we're alone. It gets kind of lonely, which has it's own trauma.

I'll have to check out your faves. Sarah McLachlan is incredible. I'll avoid 'Last Christmas', I hear that one too much and I find it fully depressing. Every time. I think it's the upbeat sound until you listen to the words. Too sad for me.

My faves:

Oh Santa - A Very Veggie Christmas - doesn't make sense unless you're a Veggie Tales fan.

I'm with Lindsay on this - Mary Did You Know - Any version really, but I love Kathy Mattea's best.

O Come O Come Emmanuel. At church on Christmas Eve. Or anywhere, any other day of the year.

Christmas Album - Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass. I'm a little girl again every time.

A Charlie Brown Christmas. Love.

CaJoh said...

I always wonder… who's "Bowsa-Holly" and why do we have to Deck the Halls with him???

Some favorites for me:
"Happy Holidays"— Andy Williams
"Christmas Time is here"— Charlie Brown Christmas Album
"The Christmas Song"— Nat King Cole ("Everybody knows a Turkey")

I know there's others, but many have already been mentioned.

Jay @halftime lessons said...


I love you, Deb, but your holiday playlist blows.

See me after school.

Tony said...

Sounds like you need to change the locks. 1- it takes care of said sister-in-law gaining entry. 2- It addresses Husband needing to show with jewely and a new plan of communication for you. Done

Brenda Jean said...

I can only say that I can so relate-- I tried to share about my SIL but deleted it.I think you have to EXPERIENCE her to truly understand. BAHAHAHAHA I can only once again say I feel your pain. But I still LOVE Christmas, cause I'm just lame like that.

angie said...

Breathe. Holidays are always so much fun. :)

in time out said...

congrats on your win, on wendy's blog. cute boys you have. and good luck with the holidays...sorry to hear about panic attacks, they are no fun.

The Mommy said...

I don't know why - but when I think of Christmas music I think of the song from Charlie Brown. lol! It was on at Target the other day and my son said "Mommy, it's Christmas Noise!" lol, too stinking cute.

I agree with the whole in-law thing. I give in to that panic, you win. :)

Harlene said...

I can't discuss my family issues out loud, I'm still too paranoid they will find me out here in blogland, let's just say, I feel ya sista.

My favorite Christmas songs are all found on John Denver and the Muppets, A Christmas together. Especially, "A baby just like you"

Funny, no one has mentioned "The Christmas Shoes" on any blog of favorites Christmas songs ANYWHERE!

Anonymous said...

OK. You got me. First time reader here, and I MUST read the entire 12 panics of Christmas. I'll have to start by saying that I don't like Christmas. Not now. Not ever. I guess it's the part of me that hates being TOLD that I HAVE to do something just because the calendar says so. Before Christmas: HO HO HO and everyone is smiling. Next day? They're mowing me down with their shopping carts and glaring at me.

Anonymous said...

p.s. I'm on my way back to my blog to list you on my blog favorites.

Wendyburd1 said...

NOOOO I want all 12 parts, I am INVESTED now!!

Ugh my jerk of an Uncle Gerald (after Grandpa died he decided hey I will be part of your family even though you don't know me!) decided to show up everyday during the Christmas season ALL day and evening until after New Years when he went home to Texas...for like 6 years when he decided he didn't like us again and disappeared from our lives again. We NEVER invited him, and for his entire 2 weeks in CT??!! NOOOOO!! The only good thing that came from those years? He preferred his bagels in a toaster oven so he bought us one...we have a new better one now though!!

Elaine A. said...

Love me some Sarah M. at Christmas too! : )

Honey Mommy said...

We put up our Christmas tree this weekend! Bring on the Christmas music... but leave your relatives at home!

Carissa(GoodnCrazy) said...

TurDUCKen? RU serious? I demand photos. PHOTOS!!

You left out "I hear the Bells" by Mike Daugherty MY FAVORITE? and Nancy Wilson?? I need links there girl!
Here's the bells...